Another day, another disaster...

So, yesterday was our news day on Baby Bennett IV's kidneys. It should have rounded off as a good day because, although the kidneys were still pronounced, they had not ballooned which means no surgery immediately before or after birth. Instead, we will have another ultrasound in the weeks following baby's arrival to make sure everything is okay.

Afterwards we grabbed a late lunch - I got a beautiful vegan salad from Ruby's Organic Cafe (in Stirling) and celebrated that I should not have to see the Obstetrician again now and that it is me and my home birth midwife the rest of the way.

However, things went to custard when I sat down to relax at someone else's home, where the boys had been staying for a play, afterwards and in the space of 15 minutes William had found foils of TramadolSR 100mg (SR = slow release) and eaten at least one and possibly two (we established afterwards).

The rest of the day is a blurred mess into today which has has been completely unproductive for this tired and emotionally shut down wreck of a mother. Watching your child with heightened responses (actual fear of any form of monitoring including stethoscopes which we have and use at home regularly) through to hyperactivity which had him crash at almost 11.00pm rather than his usual 7:30pm is a little disconcerting.

However, it was the bradychardia that followed that left this mother sleepless. Picked up on the ECG it was never commented on but made sleeping a big problem.

Whilst he was settled in the world of nod Will's little heart would fall below 75bpm, setting off the alarm. He would then wake and the alarm would stop because he would pull himself up to try and identify the source of the noise that disturbed him raising his heart rate. When it stopped he would plonk his body back down and try to re-settle. He would be almost settled when his heart rate would again decline and the alarm would re-trigger. At this point, a nurse would walk in, blame the fact that he was awake and moving on the alarm triggering, reset it and the process would repeat once he had fallen asleep once more.

It was a long night and all I can say in the positive is that at least he maintained a beautifully consistent sinus rhythm through it all.

Today has been an emotionally deadening state because of the way the prescribed recipient of the Tramadol reacted to the situation, their dismissive attitude and their inability to consider the worst case scenario in the interests of our son so that the best course of treatment would be considered before it was too late. I know that it is natural to be defensive when confronted BUT when someone's life is on the line it's time to cut through the bull and do the right thing.

We were discharged just before midday as it had fully worked through his system and his heart rate had begun to normalise from 5:00am and was perfectly normal by mid-morning (as was his appetite). We didn't do anything much today though - none of us were up for it - some of us emotionally and others physically as it was a late night for every member of our home.

Lest to say, I am considering how I feel about the events that followed my little boy coming to me with the empty foils of 6 tablets, handing them to me and saying, "Yum!" Never again do I want to experience this and I will take whatever measures are required to ensure that is the case.